So last night I decided to make them and royally b0rked it.
Here is how not to make chilli courgette pickle:
1: Inadvertantly give husband the net weight for piccalilli veg because 1kg is stuck in your head for some reason. Wonder why the slicing is taking so long and then wobble downstairs to the kitchen. Add 2tbsp fine table salt, add water and stir. Leave for an hour.
2: Wobble back downstairs to rinse and drain the courgettes. Wrap in a tea towel and leave for another hour to dry out as much as possible. So far so good.
3: Begin sterilising jars and making the pickling liquid (for Mum I used 500ml white wine vinegar, 1tsp mustard powder, 1tsp mustard seeds, 1tsp turmeric, 1tsp celery seeds and omitted the brown sugar for medical reasons). Allow to simmer for three minutes and then add the courgettes. Stir.
4: Realise that you seem to have a lot of courgettes and ask for another jar. Scoop courgettes and mixture into jars and run out of pickling liquid. Panic slightly, but make some more.
5: Finally come to understand that you have far too many courgettes. Freak out mightily and make up yet *more* pickling liquid.
6: Add the overspill of courgettes to new jar, have myoclonic twitch in right wrist and send jar flying. Look down to find self ankle-deep in courgettes. Flip out completely and run out of cope.
7: Wake up the following morning to be affectionately called a “complete noodlehead” because recipe called for 500g courgettes and *not* 1kg. Feel extremely silly but decide it will be something amusing to post about.
At least the Chicken Tribbles (© Tribble Towers) last night tasted good. So good, in fact, that I had what husband couldn’t manage! *urp*
Disability + cooking + clumsy person = Something To Make Other People Smile.
Yes indeed; I am inviting you all to laugh at my expense. You’re going to anyway. Probably. Why shouldn’t you? I did!
When you’re disabled it’s important, I think, to always be able to see the funny side. Strangers probably think I’m just a clumsy dork but, hey, they still find me quite loveable (allegedly)!
What have been your funniest (in hindsight) kitchen disasters?