Can We All Say “Ouch”?


My life, as a whole, is not rubbish – in spite of my disabilities. In general my life is above average when it comes to being a decent one.

My body, on the other hand, is made of Fail.

There will be no Fashion Friday this week because:

1: The weather is being typically English (i.e. craptastic)

and

2: Last night I had a seizure going up the stairs and crashed full-tilt on to the landing, injuring my right knee and the top of my left shoulder.

I am not getting out of bed today. Gods know what I might do to myself if I even think about attempting it. I’d behead myself or something, most likely.

I don’t mind the accidents and the injuries so much as I mind what these episodes do to my brain. Doctor Frankenfurter might think that “A mental mind-fuck can be nice” – but it really, truly isn’t.

First of all, little cells in my brain – thousands of them – are destroyed forever every time I have a seizure. They are simply wiped out, obliterated, fried. They do not regenerate in the way that other cells in the body do. This is why my articulation, speech and handwriting have deteriorated over the years. It is why I have to walk with a stick if I’m going more than 50ft from the house.

Then there is the confusion that hangs around for days or even weeks afterwards. Don’t ask me what I said last week because I’ve already forgotten responding to whatever you said to me two minutes ago. There’s disorientation and a sort of “brain fog” that won’t shift.

Also, nightmares. Not just any old type of nightmare – oh no, nothing so simple! – but nightmares that make you think you’re in a slasher movie or worse. My dreams the last few nights would disturb the Yorkshire Ripper; trust me on this, you really don’t want me to go in to them in detail for you.

My sleep pattern becomes completely shredded too. I’m awake when I should be asleep and asleep when I should be awake. This can become a bone of contention in the Tribble Household. We both know it isn’t my fault but one of us will still sometimes end up on the sofa. Usually D, as it’s far safer for me to be in bed – I have a nice wide area to not fall off and injure myself further should I seize again.

I’m glad I didn’t have anything but updating blogs and reading planned today!

I am used to this. I know that I will recover, but all the same…

Ouch.

About Missus Tribble

Media volunteer for Epilepsy Action (UK) and advocate for both epilepsy and autism awareness. Seamstress, cross-stitcher, sci-fi lover, ukulele player and Chelmsford's own Pickling Pagan who wants to inherit a TARDIS when she grows up. In the process of writing an as yet unnamed book, with anecdotes and information about being epileptic and autistic - and seeing the funny side! Also an entertainment journalist for What Culture, where I write about Doctor Who.
This entry was posted in Adapting, Born This Way, Disability, Epilepsy, Fashion Friday, Health, Injuries, Neurological, Proud To Be Me, Seizures, Status Epilepticus. Bookmark the permalink.

23 Responses to Can We All Say “Ouch”?

  1. I can’t really like this… ouch! But I wish you a speedy recovery.

  2. Dear Missus T, I pressed the like button, not because I like what happened, but because I think it is important for you to share it with others, and raise awareness in the world. People will feel more compassionate to others if they understand what they are going through, and you are very articulate. What I don’t like is your Ouch! I am so sorry, and hope that you feel better soon.

  3. Dear Missus Tribble,

    I too hope you feel better soon. Big hugs (being careful of your shoulder).

    Love Dotty xxx

    • Dear Dotty,

      Thank you very much for your kind words and for being careful of my shoulder.

      I noticed you saying that you think Kumblant is plotting against you. Shall I take away his sausage ration so that he begs forgiveness?

      Love, Missus Tribble xxx

  4. willowdot21 says:

    chin up chick no giving up!!

  5. Sorry for your troubles – hope you are on the mend.

  6. I am so sorry to hear about your seizure and it’s so frustrating that there is nothing anyone can do and no cure. Just trying to be positive, but is there no room in your house for a spare bed, even if it is a foldable one so that nobody has to sleep on the sofa?
    It always helps to look on the bright side of things: you have someone to look after you! Do not take that for granted.

    Take care and lots of love

    Fatima

  7. K. Marie says:

    I hope that you’re feeling better!! If there was an unlike button and pushing it would make your bad days go away I have a feeling that there would be a lot of people pushing that button. :-)
    Have a speedy recovery and enjoy the fact that you don’t have to be out in the craptastic English weather now. :-D
    Get better soon!!

  8. littlesundog says:

    Feel better soon my friend! Sending big, POSITIVE vibes and lots of love your way!!

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