How To Rock A Discworld Convention


Today I feel the need for something a bit lighter on my blog than the subjects of the last few days, so I’m going to write a piece on how to be Awesome at a Discworld Convention. The husband-shape and I are attending this Convention next month in Birmingham, England.

This is Discworld. It rests on top of four Elephants who travel through space on the back of a giant Turtle, The Great A’Tuin

I think you can already tell that Discworld is full of Total Bonkers. Sir Terry Pratchett does Bonkers so very beautifully.

Discworld is populated by humans, Vampires, Witches, Werewolves, Trolls, Golems, Dwarves, Elves, Nac Mac Feegles (you’ll need to Google them – I can’t explain because I’d be here for the next six months), Zombies, Wizards, Gnomes, Barbarians, Gods and so much more that the mind truly boggles. The City Watch alone have a female Werewolf, a human that needs to carry proof that he is actually human and a Dwarf who isn’t actually a Dwarf (long story!) amongst their ranks.

There is also The Librarian. The Librarian is… well, he’s The Librarian.

This is The Librarian. Don’t even ask – just agree with him every time he says “Ook”.

However, as with most Conventions, fandoms tend to collide. If you don’t want to/can’t dress as a Discworldian there are options.

Here is how to rock a Discworld Convention without being Discworldian or suffocating in a corset:

For headgear you have at least two options:

“It’s a very fine hat”

This is the Jayne Hat from Firefly (and this is Adam Baldwin – who played mercenary Jayne Cobb – wearing it). At the last Convention two years ago I was one of two people wearing one. A friend knitted mine, because I promised to donate to Cancer Research or a charity of her choice as payment and she was kind enough to accept my proposal. She made one for my son too, but he outgrew his. Silly growth hormones.

Although, I think there will be a lot of these this year too. I might take mine along as well as my Jayne Hat:

Fezes are Cool. The Doctor says so!

Fezes are so Cool that my husband even made one for my Adipose plushie!

For accessories, I intend to raid the local charities in search of a wicker “Easter” basket to carry some little friends with me:

Because I don’t own a box of frogs

Yes, those are Tribbles, from Star Trek. I used to have a friend on Etsy who made them for me until she was sent back to her own country (boo to beaurocracy and red tape!)  but she made me three grown-ups and three baby Tribbles before she left. The husband also bought me a purring Tribble plushie for Christmas and I knew that Squeaky had to come to the Convention with me. Tribbles are popular. I know this because recently I found a honking great spider hiding in the pile of furballs on the back of the sofa. Eww.

So, now that we’ve covered acceptable accessories, let’s move on to acceptable attire:

Doctors! All Eleven of them!

I actually own this particular t-shirt, but any Doctor Who t-shirt is permitted. Some people turn up wearing Dalek, Cyberman and Weeping Angel t-shirts and that’s okay too.

If you have one of these, so much the better:

 A friend of mine very kindly spent most of last year knitting this great thing of beauty for me and it still needs an outing! Probably best not to wear after a skinfull though, as I can see pratfalls occurring.

You will see all of this – and more – at a Discworld Convention. This is how to rock the event.

You now also know that – if you’re there and you see a bespectacled blonde wearing a Jayne Hat, a Doctor Who t-shirt, a scarf, a short flared skirt, leggings, killer boots and carrying a basket of fluffballs – you have met me!

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About The Hairy Housewife

Media volunteer for Epilepsy Action (UK) and advocate for both epilepsy and autism awareness. Seamstress, cross-stitcher, sci-fi lover, ukulele player and Chelmsford's own Pickling Pagan who wants to inherit a TARDIS when she grows up. In the process of writing an as yet unnamed book, with anecdotes and information about being epileptic and autistic - and seeing the funny side! Also an entertainment journalist for What Culture, where I write about Doctor Who.
This entry was posted in 2012, Discworld, Doctor Who, Doctor Who Scarf, Firefly, Jayne Hat, Sir Terry Pratchett, The Things I Do In The Name Of Fandom!, Tribbles. Bookmark the permalink.

18 Responses to How To Rock A Discworld Convention

  1. paulaacton says:

    i am jealous but surely you missed one head gear option….the pointy hat, if you wear the pointy hat surely they will all recognise your right to walk to the front of any queues and that you shouldn’t have to pay taxes or for anything else

    • Missus Tribble says:

      Haha, so very true! At every Convention there are numerous Witches and Wizards. Most of the Wizards seem to be Rincewind for some reason… :)

      • paulaacton says:

        because they only have to pretend to know one spell and they aren’t allowed to say it :D

      • Missus Tribble says:

        LOL! You really do have to love that “Wizzard”!

        Do you have a favourite Discworld book/character? The first one I read was Small Gods, but I adore Witches Abroad (and anything with the Witches in). Nanny and Greebo are my total favourites – aside from Death who is equally brilliant :D

      • paulaacton says:

        I like all the witches but out of the whole series my favourite characters are death and the librarian

      • Missus Tribble says:

        OOOK!!!!!!!!! :D

        (Yes, I love The Librarian too lol)

  2. I love the discworld books and this blog post does great credit to that world. Hope you’ll live blog some of the experience for those of us on the other side of the pond.

    • Missus Tribble says:

      Unfortunately the stupid hotel makes you pay for internet access, but I’ll be taking lots of pictures and making notes so that I can do a detailed blog post when I return home :)

      Discworld totally rocks. Do you have a favourite book/character?

      • That’ll work. I don’t have a favorite book. Like you, Death tops my list for characters. Usually has me in stitches. I hated Conina, although I got the irony.

      • Missus Tribble says:

        Death is just… brilliant. I also adore the Witches, and Greebo.

        Only Greebo could eat a Vampire in bat form, or dare to sleep on the pillow of a Vampire’s coffin (now that was funny)!

  3. I’d love to go to one of those conventions, so crazy!

    • Missus Tribble says:

      They are COMPLETELY insane, if very tiring.

      For me one of the biggest Moments Of Win was singing with a group of equally drunk people. I started singing Will You Love Me Tomorrow – and Sir Terry came and stood next to me to join in!

  4. Jojo says:

    OMG! How exciting! I’ve wanted to read the Discworld Series forever but don’t have the money for all the books. :(

  5. littlesundog says:

    This is all so foreign, but intriguing to me! I think should I attend a convention of this sort I would simply sit with my jaw hanging down, in utter awe, watching people. What entertainment!

    • Missus Tribble says:

      The best part is that the convention usually clashes with an Indian wedding, so while we’re all admiring the beautiful colours and styles of Indian formal dress, the Indian girls are fascinated by the costumes and corsets! It’s lovely when the two groups mix – although I did feel sorry for the family that came down in the lift with several half-naked “Barbarians” one year, because apparently they didn’t know where to put their eyes!

  6. WordsFallFromMyEyes says:

    Ha ha – gorgeous, funny & fantastic. And to be honest, I needed a little something lighter today too!

    Bless ya Mister ‘n Missuz

    • Missus Tribble says:

      Thanks! I’m really looking forward to it.

      If I go missing, the first place to look for me will be the pool :)

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