I can be positive all I like concerning my neurological issues, but of course there are restrictions on what I can and cannot do. Everybody has their stone walls and glass ceilings, whoever they are and regardless of health, fitness and/or disability.
In August of this year I was lucky enough to be able to attend the 2012 Discworld Convention in Birmingham, where I made friends with Death (pictured), was wished good morning by a Golem and chatted with Offler the Crocodile God. I sang songs, got drunk with friends and generally made a fool of myself, which is the Convention Way. There were silly costumes, brilliant costumes and lots of cosplay – only at a fan convention will you initially fail to recognise a friend because he isn’t covered in blue body paint and prancing about half-naked!
However, I was at the convention with my husband D, surrounded by friends and Convention Committee members who are aware of my needs (I refuse to say “special” needs as I find that quite derogatory). If things became too much I could escape to our room, or go swimming, or sit in the bar with my sewing – just watching the world go by and chatting to the occasional passing Watch member or Barbarian. Sensory overload was not an issue because I was never alone; D could leave me if he needed to because he always knew that I was being watched by others and I had escape routes if I needed them.
For those reasons alone I was able to relax – and I had a blast. Yes I ended up spending time with paramedics and getting sick, but that’s all part and parcel of being me and is completely expected at conventions: if it wasn’t me it was somebody else, because at these things you tend to overdo it even if you have known triggers that you try to avoid. Everybody is overtired, overwhelmed and over-excited at these events, so even someone with no known issues will occasionally find themselves in an ambulance or having some kind of sensory overload.
We shall sadly be passing up the 2014 Discworld Convention, as the venue has moved to Manchester and it will be too difficult for us to get to in the car – and I am unable to use public transport unless it takes me directly to my destination.
Instead, I was making plans with a friend to visit Birmingham Expo/ComicCon next year. That is, until I looked it up.
Pictured here is a London Expo event. Look at all those people! I would get to meet people dressed as my favourite Marvel/DC/Doctor Who characters (and more) and I would probably have a blast.
But.
I would be travelling alone, which neither my doctor nor my neurologist recommend. I would have to meet up with my friend and find a hotel, because this event – unlike Discworld – isn’t held in a hotel.
There are also a lot of people – it looks like a quiet day at Camden Market (which I can cope with because that’s out in the open air).
I would be subjected to being squashed and hearing a lot of noise. I would have no pool or quiet bar to escape to and I would have to have my hand stamped so that I could leave the event and go and sit in my hotel room. There would be too much noise and too many people with only Laura to cope should I suffer a seizure or a meltdown. That wouldn’t be fair on her – she’s my friend and not my carer.
Believe me, this would be a meltdown asking to happen. Also, Expo closes its doors at 5pm. What on earth would I do after that? It’s one thing to do nothing by choice because you know that your hobbies and interests are to hand, but being stuck in a hotel room with only a Kindle and cross-stitch for company unless Laura and I want to spend stupid amounts of money in a pub? We couldn’t even sneak wine up to our rooms because there wouldn’t be anywhere to buy it. I would be freaking out and throwing myself at the walls, and then there’s the possibility that Laura would feel obliged to sit in my room with me just in case, until I was ready to sleep.
You’re possibly wondering why D wouldn’t come with me. Well, he has sensory issues and can be oversensitive to sound and crowds (although he isn’t autistic) and he needs a break from caring for me in places that aren’t home. We both enjoy our brief weekends in Cheltenham with my son and my family, but that’s pretty much our limit.
The moral of my story? You are not washed up and nothing is hopeless – but some things are beyond your reach (even if only temporarily) – and you need to learn your limits before you dive in and cause yourself possible harm. Don’t feel bad about it and don’t get yourself into that nasty “I wish” mode. Perhaps you can’t achieve it now, but it doesn’t mean you never will.
I’ll make it to Expo one day. Just not now.
I have been to quite a few music festivals, but never been to a convention.
I’ve never done a music festival, although I used to attend World Music Day with my Dad (absolutely wonderful event). I’m sad about the convention, but quite a few of my friends (both from across Britain and abroad have had to rule it out too, so I wouldn’t be seeing many familiar faces.
Conventions do a number on me. I’d love to go to one, one day.
I came across this and thought it would brighten your day (even if you’ve already seen it):
I hadn’t seen the extended version before. That was absolutely epic – thanks for cheering me up
I think people feel like they need to do all that they want to do as soon as possible and not let their bodies “speak” to them. There is a time for everything, you just need to be patient
Absolutely, and something about conventions causes people to overdo it. Perhaps it’s good that I have a rest this time round
I haven’t been to a convention, local or otherwise, since they took my driver’s license for medical reasons. I kind of miss them. =shrugs= =(
I’m going to miss the DWCon too, but if I can’t get to it then there’s no sense in pouting about it. I’ll be stronger for the next one, is all
Being sensible of one’s abilities is definitely a good thing. I’m glad you’re self-aware enough to know what is and isn’t possible at the moment – and also positive enough to give yourself a goal to aim for!
If I were a DyscWorld character, these days I think I’d be Susan Sto Helit. (I was definitely Magrat when in 6th Form; even had the long tangled blonde hair.) So I’m glad you got to meet Grandfather!
I don’t know who I’d be to be honest! I have the bewbs for Angua but would need a long blonde wig and I can’t be a vampire because the “fangs” would pull my partials out (I know this; I tried it for Hallowe’en and ended up having to be a pirate. I suppose I could put a black streak in my hair for susan, but I lack the curls…
It’s more about a personality thing than appearance. I mean, I relate to Susan but I can’t walk through walls and my hair doesn’t re-arrange itself neatly for me.
I think Angua would be a good match for you, or maybe (given your love of being in the kitchen and your sense of humour), Nanny Ogg?
Nanny would be easy; make a deliberately bad home-made dress, leave my teeth out, tie a cushion across my belly and smile a lot
Seriously, I think that cosplaying Nanny and getting into her character would be enormous amounts of fun
You could sing “The Hedgehog Song” and everything. Although I suspect you’d need even more boobage to be Nanny – there’s one description of her dancing in one of the books, and it says something about when Nanny was starting to turn to the left her boobs hadn’t finished gyrating on the right. (Although I could be mixing that up with a quote about Agnes/Perdita from Maskerade.)
I suppose I could find the world’s most mahoosive bra and stuff it full of bean bags
I’m not entirely sure Nanny would wear a bra and from the description of her bosom still gyrating left when she was gyrating right, it sounds like she wasn’t bothered about support! Might be easier to make something you can clip on over your regular underthings so you don’t do yourself any mischief!
I was thinking as loose and saggy and BIG as possible
You don’t want something as heavy as real boobs tho’ – maybe polystyrene beads like what you get in bean bags these days? I reckon Nanny Ogg probably gave Jordan/Katie Price a run for her money at her largest!
The expos are terribly crowded and both me and my daughter hate those places …we did go once but there were too many people , it was suffocating plus a lot of people push each other to get ahead …i dont think i will go there ever again..or may be …
Indeed; I can’t allow my fandoms to interfere with my health.