This is not so much a serious blog post (have you ever known me to be completely serious all the time? Not happening on this planet any time soon) as it is a gentle laugh at myself. You probably all saw this coming when I announced that I was taking up jogging.
Of course I was over-zealous, and completely ignored the fact that I suffer from chronic tendinitis (I keep wanting to type “tendonitis”, but apparently that’s not how it’s spelt any more). I thought I just needed better shoes than my everyday trainers – which is obviously true, and so I bought some (Karrimors; very comfortable and with extra ankle support).
But… well, you all know me; the damage was already done on account of my stubborn nature. Did the nagging pain register in my head and tell me that I should stop? Nope. No pain, no gain and all that nonsense.
My sister didn’t have to tell me off on Facebook, because here in the south-east I could hear her yelling at me from the south-west because of my stupidity. Anybody would think that she was the sensible older sibling and that I was the flighty younger one, and I strongly suspect that she was born with the older sister brain that I was supposed to have and vice versa.
Anyway, rather than cutting my legs off or taking up self flagellation as a new and interesting hobby, I decided that it was probably better to laugh at myself and therefore have composed a poem, which is sung to “Sound of Silence”:
Tendinitis my old friend
I see you’ve come to me again
But even though the pain is bad
It’s not the worst that I have ever had
But my ankles are so swollen I can’t run
That’s no fun
And that’s the bane
When my ankles meet your wrath
I wish I’d walked a different path
Or I think I should have stayed at home
And you would have left me on my own
But it’s too late now for me to change my mind
That’s a bind
And that’s the bane
Lesson learned, and back to slow shambling, but without the moaning and the brain-eating bit.